Shooting the Rapids

"Settle down, lads, it's story time....and no, it's not "Goldilocks" again. It just so happens to be a journal I kept from my youth as an explorer."

"An explorer? Like Christopher Columbus?"

"Well, more like Daniel Boone, actually...don't I look snazzy in that photo?"

"Anyway, I set out with only my coonskin cap and the bare necessities in supplies--"

"You mean you brought the accordian on a camping trip?"

"No I did not bring the accordian. I brought only the most vital supplies. And it wasn't a camping trip, it was an exploration of the wilderness--"

--via a handmade log raft I strung together out of pine trees and rope made from woven vines."

"Here's a little map--which I drew myself--showing you my path through the wilderness. Of course, it was a vast, uncharted wilderness...and there are a few parts missing which I discovered along the way, but didn't have time to add..."

"Like what? A treasure cave? Ancient ruins?"

"Well, not exactly. Anyhow, the first few days were idyllic. Poling my way along the river, mapping the terrain as I travelled. Rereading Huckleberry Finn by firelight in the evenings.

Of course, after a few days, needless to say, I was a little lost on a big river as of yet uncharted by any explorer. No civilization in sight, so when supplies ran low, I began to wonder how long I could live off the land--"

"Why didn't you stop to ask directions from someone?"

"There is no 'someone' in the middle of the wilderness, Lionel...this is uncharted territory we're talking about--"

"What about the animals? Weren't there bears or something? Why not ask the bears which way was civilization?

"There were no bears in sight--besides, I don't happen to speak Bruin, which meant even if I did meet one, they couldn't have told me that up ahead was a shortcut up ahead...

... in the form of a giant waterfall. Needless to say it was an exciting discovery for me--"

"I took a few minutes for reflection, once I reached the bottom of the river again. Of course, there was a little swim to shore..."

"...and a long hike home, Uncle Reggie?"

"I think that's enough about my adventure for now... it's bedtime for you three."